‘Straight roads do not make for skilful drivers’ Paulo Coelho
‘Progress is rarely a straight line. There are always bumps in the road…but you can make the choice to keep looking ahead.’ Kara Goucher
‘The growth of understanding follows as ascending spiral rather than a straight line.’ Marion Milner
Do you put pressure on yourself to get everything done perfectly and in a linier fashion? Do you get annoyed when your journey isn’t smooth sailing? Hello and welcome to my world.
I have spent copious amounts of time planning, preparing and controlling every situation in my life, from getting the house work done, to my business, to walking to the shops with Ollie. I plan, I plan and I plan again. Yet it would seem that the world is against me because it never works out that way. Now I can tell you why… LIFE ISN’T MEANT TO. It is ok, life is meant to teach, coach and help you develop. If you are set on things being perfect then how can you improve?
So this was my thinking when I walk taking Ollie to the library last week, I decided to document the journey because I had decided to ‘let go’ and not take his pram or changing bag OR REINS. I thought it was a good time for a lovely stroll with no fuss.
I know, I know it is slight insanity on my part but I felt the urge to go nuts!
Ollie has a new fascination with drain covers and on any walk lately we have to jump on or run over every one we see (yes I have tried to distract him at times so I can move a bit faster). On this walk however I decided to just stay calm and relaxed and see how long the 5-6 min journey would take us.
9:46am – We leave the house, happy and ready for the sunny walk
9:47am – We have a great start and get up the stairs and to the gate ignoring the first LOUD drain in our garden. This is going to be smooth! We start running down our street holding hands and jumping on drains.
9:49am – We end up in the doctors surgery.
9:50am – We leave the doctors surgery to jump on the same drains we just jumped on.
9:52am – We jump on 3 consecutive drains 3/4 times before spot another one at the end of the road and Ollie runs for it.
(To give some perspective our house is only about 100 yards from the main road we need to reach)
9:57am – We cross the road and find our first of many drains. We walk in a ‘straight line’ towards the library.
We stop, we jump on a drain, we go back to 1st one because it has a louder sound, then we run forward again. Then we stop and I have to carry Ollie across the road and he finds some more drains. We run, we jump, we go back over the same drain. I ask him to move forward, he gets stroppy, sits on the floor and screams. I lift him up, he calms down, we move on…and repeat another time.
9:59am – We are back to walking smoothly and we are about 100 yards from the library.
We jump on another 11 drains before reaching our destination where Ollie runs straight into the adult section shouting JUMP as they have grates inside the library that rattle!
We arrived at 10:04am!
Yes so what is the moral of the story you ask?
We made it, yes the 3-4 minute walk that it would take me took 18 minutes.
Did I plan for that? NO!
Did it ruin my day to not have control over that small instance? NO! Actually it was a lovely walk, even the 2 second tantrums were over before it even mattered.
The walk back was much the same, we found some new drains, crossed with the green man and laughed at pebbles stuck in a wall. It was a great walk.
Now with anything, when starting to let go of control and relaxing, it can seem daunting and it should be done in baby steps (no pun intended!). If you can let go in small situations such as these it gives you confidence that you can let go in bigger situations. The one thing that will help you do this is support, from whoever you are working with, living with and who the situation involves.
Over the last 18 months I have learnt to relax more and Ollie and Dan have been my biggest control situations, but I can whole heartedly say that I LOVE being able to enjoy a moment, to allow things to just happen and be!
I hope today you can let go in a situation that gives you the power to know you can achieve anything!
Much love and light this Bank Holiday!